How Famous Authors Can Prevent Spoilers- J.K. Rowling and the Cursed Child

She’s smiling now, but if you spoil the ending to Harry Potter and the Cursed Child, she’ll be pissed. (image via Wikimedia)

It’s a problem only a truly successful author can have.  Famous author J.K. Rowling doesn’t want fans to spoil the ending of her new play Harry Potter and the Cursed Child.

Spoilers are probably inevitable though.  A play isn’t like a movie; people can’t attend simultaneous performances.  Only a fortunate few will see each performance, but those few will be excited and want to talk about it, and once they start yammering about it, secrets about what happens will be revealed and feelings will be hurt.  Maybe even J.K. Rowling’s feelings.

Nobody wants to hurt J.K. Rowling’s feelings.

Even if J.K. Rowling fans take J.K. Rowling’s request to go spoiler-free seriously, there are a few jerks in every crowd, and somebody will spoil the end.  After all, J.K. Rowling couldn’t even keep Robert Galbraith a secret for long, so you know somebody will spoil  The Cursed Child.

There is a way to prevent spoilers in this situation, but only an author like J.K. Rowling could do it.  Next time she writes a novel (or a play), she should have several different endings and not tell the public there are several different endings.  Each book (with the different endings) would have the exact same cover.  The whole point is that none none of her fans would have any idea that there were several different endings.

Then, when somebody spoils the ending, somebody else who has read the book (but probably a different version) will overhear the conversation and contradict the spoiler.  A big argument will ensue over how the book really ended.  If the gods are devious that day, several different readers who’ve read several different versions will end up arguing with each other at the same time.

How long would it take before the public realizes it has been pranked?  Then J.K. Rowling could eventually declare that one ending is the definitively true ending, and fans could argue over which ending it is.

Rowling could use the spoilers’ eagerness to ruin other peoples’ enjoyment against them.  It would be awesome if done correctly.

I’d do it myself, but I’m a struggling aspiring author.   I’d be lucky if several people read my books and discussed them with each other.  Only an author like J.K. Rowling (or Stephen King) could pull this off.  Maybe George R.R. Martin could do it, but it would take him a couple decades to write all five endings.

Maybe this has already been done, and I don’t know about it.  I can’t be the first person to have ever thought about this.  I’d hate to have this grand idea and then have a bunch of people point out that it has already been done dozens of times.  It would be humiliating.  But even if it has been done, it probably hasn’t been done by somebody with a following like J.K. Rowling.

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What do you think?  Would you be upset if you found out you had been pranked by an author who wrote several different endings?  Has somebody already done this and I just don’t know about it?  What authors other than J.K. Rowling could pull off a spoiler-prevention prank like this?

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When I was a kid, I got my mouth washed out with soap for saying the word crap.

Looking back, it ticks me off because now I know….

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