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I’ve Published More Books Than James Patterson in 2016!!

January 3, 2016
If any author could publish 365 different books in one year, it would James Patterson. (image via wikimedia)

If any author could publish 365 different books in one year, it would be James Patterson. (image via wikimedia)

James Patterson published a lot of books last year.  I’m not sure how many because I got confused when I went to his website and lost count.  But James Patterson hasn’t published any new books yet in 2016.  I’m not sure what the hold up is.  I just published a new book yesterday on Amazon (Crap Is NOT a Bad Word!: and Other Topics Polite People Don’t Discuss).  If I already have a book out, then James Patterson should have three or four done by now.

Just so you know, I don’t mention James Patterson in my new book.

James Patterson has a lot of help publishing lots of books, including a slew of co-authors.  I’m not being judgmental; that’s just the way it is.  On the other hand, I work a full-time job that has nothing to do with writing, and I do all of the writing myself.  I get about 15-30 minutes to write each weekday and maybe a couple hours each Saturday and Sunday.

I’m not complaining.  I chose to get employed in a field which has nothing to do with writing, and James Patterson chose to do whatever it took to write books, get an agent, find a publisher, and become successful.  I’m sure it wasn’t easy for him when he started.  I bet it’s pretty easy for him now, though.

James Patterson’s first book of 2016 comes out on January 25.  I’m not going to announce the title of his book because then I’d be giving him free advertising.  That wouldn’t make sense.  Here I am trying to give my own book free advertising and instead I’m publicizing James Patterson’s new book which hasn’t even comes out yet.  That would make me look stupid.

Anyway, I probably won’t be able to get another book out by January 25.  Maybe I could, but it wouldn’t be any good. Still, it would be an accomplishment to stay one book ahead of James Patterson this year.

Patterson’s second book of 2016 is due out March 14.  I could probably have another short e-book out before then, but then his next book comes out on March 21.  That’s two books in one month.  Even if I took some time off of work, I couldn’t publish three books in three months.  If I hired some writers to do my work for me, I might be able to do it, but I don’t get paid enough at my job to hire writers for my e-books.

Even if I did have enough money, my wife wouldn’t let me do it.  She wants me to write my own books until they make enough money for me to hire other authors to write my books for me.  But that might take a while.  That’s okay.  I’m content writing my own stuff.

At any rate, maybe I can’t compare my e-book with James Patterson’s real books.   My e-book is just an e-book, so maybe it doesn’t even count.  James Patterson has a real publisher who actually prints out his books on paper.  It can be an expensive process, so I don’t do it.  Maybe I should start that whole process again of finding a literary agent and a publisher (I tried and gave up in the 1990’s).

Here’s another problem.  Amazon listed my publication date as December 31, 2015.  That irked me a little bit.  I made sure that it wasn’t December 31 in any part of the world when I began putting in my book information on Amazon.  Still, I’m listed as a 2015 book.

Anyway, my new ebook is out.  It’s not an actual book, and Amazon says it wasn’t published in 2016, but I don’t care.  In my mind… I’ve published more books than James Patterson in 2016!!!

At least for a couple weeks.

Here it is!  The book that James Patterson doesn’t want you to read (that’s an obviously untrue statement, but it sounded great in my head).

Now on sale!  Only 99 cents!!

Crap Is NOT a Bad Word!: and Other Topics Polite People Don’t Discuss

Now available on the Amazon Kindle!

Now available on the Amazon Kindle!

  1. Hey hi…this sounds like its going to be a pretty good read..just checked it out on amazon. Can’t find the eBook price though. Happy new year to you and yours. Cheerios.

  2. You think you have problems with James Patterson? What about the fact I followed Captain James T. Kirk on Twitter (he likes to call himself William Shatner on there). Did he follow back? No, he bloody didn’t…

    • William Shatner doesn’t seem to follow anybody back, so I wouldn’t take it personally.

      James Patterson might follow you back. He doesn’t have nearly as many Twitter followers as William Shatner, and Patterson follows a lot more people.

      • Thanks, but Patterson is no Kirk, no matter how many books he writes…

        Seriously, though — great post, and perfect tone if you’re writing humour.

  3. IT’S NOT A COMPETITION! Apart from when you’re winning so good job!
    On a more serious note, this post made me laugh a whole lot.

    • I’m pretty sure James Patterson isn’t aware of me, and it can’t be a competition if one of the competitors isn’t aware of the existence of the other competitor. I guess under that rule, it can’t be a competition.

      Maybe I’ll challenge him to a competition next year, but James Patterson would have to be aware of my existence for my challenge to mean anything.

  4. I’m in the middle of a break-up, so there hasn’t been much to laugh about for me lately. However, your latest post did get a serious laugh and a lot of giggling with my head shaking in amazement. I can’t explain why, but on Facebook I’ve been seeing a lot of ads telling me to sign up for a James Patterson class on writing. Is this true irony?

    • Well, some people say Facebook knows everything about everybody who uses Facebook.

      I don’t know enough about Patterson’s class to have a legitimate opinion about it. I can barely wrap my brain around the number of books he writes.

  5. downloaded your book, congrats!

  6. Hi! I read your book and enjoyed it and blogged about your book and your blog here:

    I hope you don’t mind. I don’t really know if there is etiquette around blogging about other people’s blogs.

    • Thank you! From my point of view, I think what you did was great! Any blogger would be proud to have that written about him or her.

      And those “crap” pictures on your post are awesome! Thanks!

Trackbacks & Pingbacks

  1. I’ve Published More Books Than James Patterson in 2016!! | musnadjia423wordpress
  2. I’ve Published More Books Than James Patterson in 2016!! | sweatingthewriting

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