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Nice Things cheap on Amazon!

August 8, 2015
It's inexpensive, not cheap.

It’s inexpensive, not cheap.

The problem with giving away stuff for free is that it can’t last forever.  At some point, you have to start charging for it.  So now is the time that you can get Nice Things cheap (instead of free) on Amazon.  Cheap isn’t as good as free, but cheap isn’t bad either.

Nice Things is now $2.99 instead of free.  Maybe $2.99 isn’t “cheap,” but Amazon suggested that I charge more.  I mean, nobody from Amazon called me and told me to charge more.  Amazon has an algorithm that suggests prices to authors to maximize profits.

The algorithm sounds impersonal, but the alternative would be for Amazon to hire a bunch of people to read all the e-books that get submitted and then tell the authors how much to charge.  That would be an inefficient way to suggest pricing to authors.  Amazon is probably better off with its algorithm.

I have no problem with the concept of maximizing profits, but since I’m not established at all as an author, I wanted to take the less expensive route.  I thought about charging even less than $2.99, but Nice Things has a sex scene in it.  I’ve written only one sex scene in my life, and this is it.  I might not ever write another one.

If Nice Things has the only adult scene I’ll ever write, then I should charge at least $2.99 for it.  Cheap sex is okay, but I don’t want it to be too cheap.  Stuff like that can ruin a writer’s reputation.

I had a lot of fun writing Nice Things, even the parts that weren’t the adult scene.  I know there are a lot of books out there to read, but if you like Dysfunctional Literacy, you’ll probably like Nice Things too.

So here it is!

*****

New from Dysfunctional Literacy!

If you absolutely must do something morally wrong, just pretend that you’re doing Nice Things.

Now available on the Amazon Kindle!

Now available on the Amazon Kindle!

From → Dysfunctileaks

18 Comments
  1. Reblogged this on newsout24x7.

  2. Paying for sex scenes feels kind of wrong, so I got the book for free during the promotion. 🙂

  3. I have a double edged comment to make. Good news first or bad?
    Bad, I think (I prefer them that way round, don’t you?) Bad news is, I don’t have a Kindle, so I can’t download Nice Things, free or cheap or any other way.
    I know I probably ‘should’, being a wannabe writer myself but I jusy haven’t got round to it.
    Good news – I read your excerpt on Amazon and really enjoyed it. Your writing always makes me chuckle – that’s why i follow you, after all – but Nice Things was great.
    And writing a sex scene? You’re braver than I. They’re a tricky thing to get right, walking a fine line between originality, sensuality and just plain weirdness.
    And no writer wants to writer the Bad Sex award …
    http://www.theguardian.com/books/poll/2014/nov/12/literary-review-bad-sex-award-shortlist-2014

    • Thanks for reading the sample,and I understand about the Kindle. Somebody had to give me a Kindle a few years ago before I started using one.

      I read the article you linked, but I don’t want to criticize the scenes they chose because mine could be mock-worthy too and I don’t know it. But the comments after the article are just as entertaining as the excerpts.

      • I don’t have anything against Kindles – I guess I just don;t want yet another item in the house I have to charge 🙂 The sex act itself is pretty to easy to mock (as a viewer, at least), so writing about it is bound to be terrifically hard 🙂 I’m sure your inner critic would’ve been screaming at you if your scenes were bad. I think the awards are just there to highlight how very hard writing sex scenes are

        • Just a thought – the kindle app is free. If you have a tablet or a smart phone you don’t need a Kindle to read the book.

          • Err … I have a very DUMB phone, does that help? Thanks for the tip, though. Sorry, no smartphone here. Just bought my son his first phone and it’s waaaay better than mine. That’s not right is it?

      • And by the way reading your excerpt was a pleasure – very enjoyable 🙂

  4. Hi! I finally finished reading! I must congratulate you again! Everything is very modern and funny, in a smart way. It is brave to publish writings, but it is braver to publish such a personal text. It is catchy and a little moving, which makes it a nice book! Nevertheless, as the theme is quite common, I don’t think you can sell it for more than 10$… Anyway, thank you for this agreeable reading moment!

    • Thank you for reading and commenting! It means a lot.

      I’m not sure I can go as high as $10 though. Even Amazon’s algorithm didn’t suggest a price that high, and Amazon’s algorithm knows everything (at least it knows more than me).

  5. I finished it today and enjoyed it. I went to Amazon to write a review and was reminded of how terrible I am at writing reviews. I’m really quite bad at it, which is why I don’t do them on my blog, or on Amazon for that matter. I was also torn because I wanted to say something about your blog but I didn’t know if you wanted your blog connected to your book on Amazon. You’ve always kept things very compartmentalized. All of it was too overwhelming and I gave up. However, I will give it another go because I did read it and I did like it and I got it for free, so I feel I owe it to you. I do have one complaint, though. Not long enough. This could have been a 200 or even 300 page book. I would have liked to have spent more time with it. I could see it getting optioned as a screenplay, if the right person comes across it. You never know. Keep pluggin’ it. Congrats on getting it out there.

    • Thank you! I really appreciate you reading Nice Things and commenting. I’m glad you enjoyed it.

      It’s funny, though, I had the same issues with my blurb on Amazon that you mentioned in writing your review (I wasn’t sure if I should mention Dysfunctional Literacy or The Literary Girlfriend either). I don’t mind if you mention them, but I wasn’t sure how to handle it on my blurb (I hope that makes sense).

      Either way, thanks again!

  6. Hey, just discovered your blog in my research for other things. Very interesting insights! Never crossed my mind that publishing books containing sex scenes is … well, not good. Just finished two books of my own (editing phase now), the first one I’ll publish on Amazon on the 4th of Sept. It doesn’t contain sex scenes, just something “spicy” at the end, but Part II is full of them. Still got time to decide on the price for part II though.

    • I like that idea, two books, the first book just gets “spicy,” and then Part II goes all-out.

      The good thing is, if you can’t decide on a price for Part II, Amazon will suggest one for you. I don’t know if the Amazon price algorithm distinguishes between “spice” and sex, though.

  7. Sorry, I meant publishing books containing sex scenes for a LOW PRICE is not good 🙂

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