When Super Bowl Commercials Ruin A Game…
As much as I love football, the worst part is the commercials. Nothing destroys the flow of the game like a series of commercials after kickoffs, turnovers, and short series punts, not to mention time-outs. And the worst game of all for commercials is the Super Bowl.
If the hype of the game itself has gotten out of control, the hype for Super Bowl commercials is even worse, with talk about how much time-slots cost, what stars are going to be in the ads, what new products are being introduced, etc..
Yeah, some of the commercials are funny, but the Super Bowl isn’t the time for funny. The Super Bowl is a serious game, and a funny creative commercial is still just a commercial that gets in the way of the game. And now I’ve just heard a news report (on a NEWS show) about a company promoting its Super Bowl commercials a week before the game. I won’t mention the product because they’ve already gotten enough free advertising (unless they want to pay me).
Since the hype for upcoming Super Bowl commercials has already begun, it’s the perfect time to present…
Let’s Talk Football: A Super Bowl Joke!!!
The Super Bowl to a hardcore football fan is like New Year’s Eve to a drunk: it’s annoying because that’s when the amateurs come out.
So when a hardcore football fan was invited to a Super Bowl party, he was actually dreading it because it would be packed with a bunch of amateurs (women and guys who didn’t really care about the football game) and all they’d do is talk about the commercials. Still, the hardcore football fan didn’t want to watch the big game by himself, so he decided to go.
And the party was worse than he thought it would be.
The amateurs cackled and guffawed at the commercials and talked really loudly about them during the game so that the hardcore football fan couldn’t hear the game commentary (If John Gruden’s not calling the game, the commentary doesn’t really matter, but still…).
During the halftime show, the hardcore football fan wanted to discuss the game, but everybody else was still ranking the commercials and talking about the teeny-bopper chick performing at the show.
When the third quarter resumed, the hardcore football fan tried to talk about the game some more, but the partiers were still discussing the teeny-bopper chick half-time performer and were still re-ranking the commercials after each new ad. The hardcore football fan had had enough (Using the phrase “had had enough” is grammatically correct in this situation).
The hardcore football fan couldn’t hear the game, and he was about to complain when the host approached him.
“I’m really sorry about this,” the host said, “but I’m going to have to ask you to leave.”
“What?” the hardcore football fan replied, exasperated even though he felt out of place. “But why?”
“Because people are complaining about you,” the host said. “Whenever you talk about the game, nobody else can hear the commercials.”
This isn’t quite a true story, but I was told during a Super Bowl party a few years ago to shut up because other people couldn’t hear the commercials. This particularly offended me because these same people usually complained that I was too quiet (and I have a monotone voice).
Because of this, I’ll always be a little bitter towards Super Bowl commercials.
But enough about me! How do you watch the game? Do you like commercials better than the game? Ugh! What seemingly trivial event in your life has made you irrationally bitter?